They were strikingly nasty, tasting вЂ“ as their name suggests вЂ“ of little but sugar. The infantilisation of British palatesД«y accident, I recently bought a packet of Cotton Candy grapes. Applaud until our hands hurt, by all means, but stand up for nothing less than the performance of a lifetime (or a train that leaves in the next ten minutes).

But as we resume our seats in the auditorium, we should remember HaitinkвЂ™s scathing view of performative adulation.

The effects on live performance of Covid restrictions have been painful. The late conductor Bernard Haitink condemned with unusual vehemence the вЂњidiotsвЂќ who bellowed their approval of a concert performance before the final note had died away. But the suspicion grows that it is more about egotism than altruism. If a standing ovation were an unforced expression of gratitude for an uplifting performance, there would be no case against it. While the ovation traces its origins to ancient times, when it was a consolation prize for B+ military types who didnвЂ™t quite merit a Roman triumph, the obligatory theatrical standing ovation has its origins in the US, where applause inflation has been the subject of innumerable pained articles by fastidious critics who prefer a finer gradation of enthusiasm.Д«ack in 2012, the New York TimesвЂ™s then chief theatre critic, Ben Brantley, observed that, вЂњThe SO вЂ¦ has become a reflexive social gesture, like shaking hands with the host at the end of a party.вЂќ On the other side of the Atlantic, the Cannes Film Festival has acquired an unenviable reputation for interminable ovations. As long ago as 1989, Dustin Hoffman was distinctly miffed when his performance as Shylock in Sir Peter HallвЂ™s production of the Merchant of Venice failed to bring the West End audience to its feet. Once a rare and spontaneous gesture of acknowledgment for a remarkable performance, the standing ovation has become the default expression of approval вЂ“ so much so that seated applause can be taken as indifference or even as an insult. Then, either from shared enthusiasm or because they now canвЂ™t see the performers taking their bows, everyone else follows, save for a few die-hard grumpies. It generally starts in the stalls, with people popping up like observant meerkats. The concluding words of the drama are spoken, the last note sounds in the auditorium вЂ“ and while it still echoes, the audience is on its feet, applauding.

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